Does Franky Qualify As A Cat: My Husband Should Sleep More

the dumbest cat on earth

The other night my husband and I entered into a debate on weather or not our grey tabby, Franky, was really a cat.

“She has none of the qualities used to describe cats.  She’s about as smart as a rock and she doesn’t even meow right.”  To this I had little to add except that genes state she’s a cat and she only eats cat food.

“So does the hedgehog.” he responded, ruining my argument.

To tired to continue, I went to bed and assumed he’d forget about it come morning.  Unfortunately my husband suffers from Insomnia and had all night to stew on reasons poor Franky is under qualified for cat-hood.  Given, in three years she has yet to figure out where the cat in the mirror is, I’m going to let you people decide.  Fortunate for you, my husband wrote this… essay:

Six things that make a “cat” that Franky lacks…

1. Gracefulness – watch her get out of a window. Kramer from Siendfeld could learn a few tricks from her.
2. Cunningness –DERP, derp, derp,!!!
3. To land on her feet – Refer to reason one.
4. Realizes that fire is hot – She walked over a candle and set her tummy on fire… More than once.
5. Cleaning herself – I tried to wash her once, the smell just got worse.
6. Ability to back-up – Seriously, have you ever seen her do it?

It is my theory that Franky is an assemblage dryer lint and fleas.